Sunday, December 02, 2007

Agape

My dad has been my mentor in life and ministry. He is still teaching me even today.
Donald Fredrick is 85 years old, and he has ahlzhiemers which mostly means at this point in time that he has almost no short term memory. (Something we take for granted.) Most of the time when we are with him, he has a joyous, loving, and positive personality. But when night time comes, things change. I think it is due to what is described as "Sundowners" which people with dementia experience when the sun goes down...and it is especially bad when they are in an unfamiliar setting. They get disorientated, agitated, and fixated on certain things.Dad calls me almost every night and accuses us of stealing their car. He often does it with anger, and then he says that he does not want us to come and see them anymore. He forgets the next day that he has made any phone call, is fine during the day, and then calls that night once again.
The reality is that neither of my parents can drive anymore, even though they at times dispute this, and that they have given us permission to buy their car from them which we have done. But they, neither of them, are able to remember this. We can't take the car back to them because then they want to drive it. Oh well, I don't want to bother you with all the details and options we have to think through. That is not the reason I'm writing this.
Why I'm writing this is to share what the Lord is teaching us through it. He is teaching us about agape love which is loving unconditionally. It is about learning to love people whether they deserve it or not and especially when they don't. It is how God loves us. It is how Jesus loved those who were murdering him on the cross. It is how his followers are called to love. It is how I am called to love my precious papa. I ain't saying it's easy or has been something I was able to do right away. I have struggled and yelled at him a couple of times. But I am starting to get it and learn my lesson.
I suppose it falls into the category of forgiveness, and we are called to live this way in the kingdom, in our families, and for the sake of the kind of world God desires and dreams of.

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